One of the most important lessons I learned from this chapter of my life is that sometimes when life’s stresses start to feel like too much, leaning on an unbiased third party with professional training is the best thing we can do for ourselves. Here are 5 things about therapy I wish I’d known much sooner, to help me move through some common barriers to access and get the help I needed.Read More
When we talk about being self-aware or in-tune with ourselves, I think we tend to think of it mostly as a mental and emotional thing. Personally, I’ve always felt like a pretty self-aware person – and most of that work feels like it happens in my mind. Sorting out our feelings, dissecting them, making decisions, finding our boundaries, trying to decide what feels ‘good’ or ‘bad’ in a relationship or at a job … it’s all very cerebral.Read More
Last weekend, Joe and I watched the movie Lady Bird, and I felt a whole lot of feelings (which may or may not have included at least one instance of spontaneous surprise-sobbing). That’s not shocking, to be honest – not only am I a walking ball of feelings, but it’s also a movie packed with stories and themes that hit particularly close to home.Read More
As highly self-aware introspective people, we’re really good at noticing when something feels ‘off’ or ‘not quite right’ – and so often, our impulse is to move immediately into Detective Mode. But let's be honest - that 'information hunter' approach to being an introspective person can start to feel exhausting. But what if there's a better way?Read More
I can’t be the only one who, in a tense conversation, has desperately wished the other person’s thoughts would just appear above their head in a little cartoony bubble.
For being such an important part of building thriving, healthy relationships, communication sure is a muddy skill to master. First, there’s the challenge of articulating our piece – finding the right words, sharing them in the right tone, and putting both through the right filters to make sure we’re approaching the situation with focus and sensitivity. Then on top of that, we also have to master the art of being on the receiving end of the dialogue – how to really listen, how to relate to and make sense of new information, and how to frame our responses.Read More
I vividly remember my dad introducing me to the Myers-Briggs type theory when I was an awkward preteen, and how it felt to suddenly see myself so clearly.
I remember pouring over the details of my personality type’s profile, and feeling totally awestruck by the accuracy of it all. This description I was reading of myself in a book I’d never heard of was articulating details about myself that I’d always known, but never been able to pinpoint. How could a stranger possibly know me so well?Read More
It can be incredibly, frustratingly, deceptively difficult to know how we feel. When I spent some time chatting with Kayla Hollatz a little while back in an episode of her #createlounge podcast, we spent a lot of time unpacking big, important ideas like gentle strength and self-trust. The more I think about these two ideas, the more I believe they’re related. Not just related, but dependent on each other. Shaping a healthy relationship with ourselves demands a delicate, purposeful balance of gentle strength – firm but forgiving, patient but assured. And the ‘strength’ part of that equation – feeling strong, self-assured, and centered – comes from building an immense sense of trust in ourselves over time.Read More
Sometimes, knowing what we want isn’t as simple as it sounds. We make choices all the time that shape the way we live. What to do for a living, who to foster close relationships with, where to live, what our relationships look and feel like, how to start our day, how to end our day, the kind of relationships we have with ourselves. And in theory, we make those choices based on some understanding of what we want, or what feels good, or what works for us.
But what if ‘what you want’ feels totally unclear?Read More